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It's the most wonderful time of the year.
That's what that cheesy Christmas tune says, so it must be true. It's the most wonderful time of the year because everyone thinks that if they're not nice to each other they're somehow offending Jesus and they'll burn in hell. Lucky for us we have 10 1/2 other months throughout the year for people to treat each other like crap - lie, cheat, steal, kill and covet. Lucky for us these other behaviors don't offend anyone.
Many comedians have said that the only thing separating humans from animals is superstition and mindless rituals. Ironically, scientists say that what separates us from the animals is the ability to reason. I put "reason" in the same category as "personality". There are judges with an amazing ability to reason and criminals with absolutely no ability to reason. This is why I believe in multiple personalities - I've met plenty of people who have none.
Where am I going with this? I always have a point... even when I ramble insanely just to get stuff off my chest. My point this time around is that there is one more thing that separates us from the animals: excuses.
I guess making excuses is another form of reasoning. It seems to be the only form of reasoning I see on a daily basis. People don't seem to be able to see two steps beyond where they are at this exact moment in time. Just once I'd like someone to explain to me the reasoning of why he parked RIGHT NEXT to my car in an empty parking lot. The same goes for the guy who bellies-up to the next urinal when there are four more empty ones further down the line. Just try getting out of a parking lot that's anywhere near a traffic light. People will stop right in front of you even when there's twenty feet of empty space between them and next car... but try getting that kind of space from the guy behind you at the ATM.
We all make excuses... for all our behaviors. "That's the way I was raised." "It's Christmas." "I don't have time." "I have to be practical." "I have a family." "I had to lie to you - you would have said NO." "That wasn't me - it must have been the dog."
Enough excuses, people. Probably the worst disservice you can do to yourself is turning into everything you've ever hated. You're here for a reason. When you struggle in Hollywood, you face the extra irony of wanting to make movies that send a message, yet your actual life is slowly becoming anything but message worthy. You want to write action-packed adventures, but forty hours a week you're inventorying packages of bread. Your heart burns with romantic fantasies, but your boyfriend has taken to turning his underwear inside-out so that he doesn't have to do laundry. You want to write about winners who triumph over impossible odds, but you don't know anybody like that. Cleaning behind the refrigerator isn't going to make Indy jealous.
So, where do the excuses end? Do you want to do this or not? You know my policy, people. If you're not playing the game, you're just in the way. Get to the sidelines where you belong. Of course you need a back-up plan, but how many Hollywood success stories do you hear where writing or acting was someone's back-up plan? People wait tables so that they can feed their acting. They don't take acting gigs so that they can put themselves through med school. Ashton Kutcher isn't doing this until he can get in the IBEW.
Get writing. Makes those calls. Are you listening to me?
You can be nice to people in March, by the way.
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